In Blood and Worth Loving 2: Lost Without You Read online

  He tightened his grip. “Then you’re selling yourself short. You deserve so much more than he’s offering, sweet.” He nibbled at her neck.

  Her stomach muscles tightened and her heartbeat increased. “I’ll make that decision, if you don’t mind.”

  “And if I do?”

  “What?” It was difficult to think clearly with his mouth on her skin.

  He traced her ear with the tip of his tongue. “You heard me, sweet.” She trembled. “My name is Cayenne.”

  He slipped his free arm around her waist to draw her closer. “And a very nice name it is.”

  “Then why don’t you try using it?” she asked, only just resisting the urge to lean into him. The aroma of his cologne and his unrelenting flirting intoxicated her senses, making her feel almost drunk with a combination of excitement and anticipation.

  He brushed his fingers against her neck. “I prefer sweet. So sue me.”

  “You make it impossible to stay mad at you.”

  “That’s not what Rayna says. She tells me I’m a royal pain in the ass.”

  “The only way I could imagine you being a pain there was if you wanted anal sex.” Embarrassed, she tugged her hand free and moved away.

  He slipped his arms around her from behind and spoke against her ear. “Unless I had my cock in your ass?” Just the suggestion sent an unmistakable shiver through her. “There’s not a chance in hell of that happening.” He turned her around in his arms. “Why not?”

  “Because I want Michael back! I’m not interested in a fling with you.”

  “You want him back even though you know he only wants to use you for on-demand pussy?” The remark stung. She responded by slapping him. “Bastard!” She turned and rushed through the club, tears stinging her eyes. Rather to her surprise, he didn’t follow her. She reached her car and slipped inside, shaking.

  After she stopped trembling, she closed her eyes. What had possessed her to slap him? There was only one way to rectify the situation. She took a deep, calming breath and reluctantly returned to the club.

  Inside, she searched for fifteen minutes before she decided he’d left. Damn. Now what?

  “Looking for me again, sweetheart?”

  A wall of relief washed over her at the sound of his voice behind her. Without giving herself time to decide how to react, she swung around to grip the lapels of the dark jacket he wore. “I shouldn’t have hit you. I’m so sorry.”

  “And that’s supposed to make everything right between us? You expect me to accept a simple, half-assed apology?”

  She tightened her grip on his lapels. “It’s sincere.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes! Oh, yes. I promise you it is.”

  “ Well, you know what I say to that?”

  She sighed, allowing her hands to drop from his jacket. “What?” He brushed his fingers against her neck. “I accept your apology.” She sucked in a breath and then impulsively reached up to kiss him on the corner of his mouth. “Thank you!” He drew her in his arms and bent his head.

  Feeling his teeth against the side of her neck sent a strange rush of pleasure through her. She balled her hands into fists and pulled away from him.

  “Have dinner with me, sweet.”

  She nodded. “Yes, but you have to promise to keep your mouth and teeth to yourself.”

  “Why would I make such a rash promise?”

  “Just promise?”

  “Just promise?”

  “What good would it do either one of us for me to make a promise I have no intentions of keeping?”

  “What?”

  “I’m not going to promise.” He shook his head and slipped his arm around her shoulders. “Let’s get out of here and go someplace more romantic.”

  Even as she left the club with him, she told herself she should insist he respect the boundaries she placed on their acquaintanceship. But he’d already refused and there was no way in hell she would forgo spending the evening with him. She had no intentions of letting things get out of hand, but she needed to spend an evening with a man who clearly found her attractive.

  She drew away from him at her car. “Where are we heading? I’ll follow you.” He took her keys from her and slipped them into his pants pocket.

  “Hey!”

  He pressed a finger against her lips. “We’ll go in my car and I’ll bring you back at the end of the night.” He leaned down to brush his lips against her neck. “Unless you decide to spend the night with me instead.” She shoved against his shoulders. “I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for that to happen if I were you.” He laughed, tipped up her chin, and pressed a long, moist kiss against the side of her neck.

  A jolt of desire sizzled through her. She pressed her hands against his chest.

  He took both of her hands in his and kissed each of them before slipping an arm around her shoulders.

  She sucked in a breath and stared up at him.

  “If you keep looking up at me like that, I’ll think you want me to nibble at that lovely neck of yours again.”

  “You’d better not,” she said, stepping away from him.

  He laughed and slapped her ass so hard, both cheeks stung.

  She gasped. “Keep your hands off my butt.”

  “Butt?” He shook his head and stepped close to her. “Don’t sell yourself short, sweet. This….” He slipped both arms around her and palmed her. “is a big, round, beautiful, slappable ass.” Telling herself she should be insulted didn’t help. She felt flattered.

  “You can trust me, sweet.” He bent his head to touch his lips against her ear. “I won’t hurt you.” She nodded, to show him that she believed him.

  He turned her and led her to a late model luxury car that she knew cost far more than she made in a year. The leather passenger seat felt as if it had been made to contour itself to her body.

  Chapter Four

  “This is an exquisite vehicle,” she said, settling into the plush leather of the passenger seat.

  “You like it, sweet?”

  “What’s not to like?” she asked as he started the car.

  “Would you like it?”

  “Would I like to drive it?” She smiled. “Of course I would.”

  “No. I meant would you like to have this car.”

  “What?”

  “I’ll make you a gift of it, sweet.”

  She turned to stare at his profile. “What?”

  He glanced at her. “I have two others. I won’t miss it.”

  “This must cost—”

  “I’m the guy who bought it. I know what it cost. Say the word and it’s yours, sweet. Do you want it?”

  “Yes. No! Of course I don’t.”

  He laughed and keeping his gaze on the road, he reached over to brush his hand against her breasts. “If you change your mind, it’s yours, sweet.”

  Cayenne settled back into her seat, uncertain if he were serious or joking.

  “In the mood for some music, sweet?” he asked into the silence.

  “Yes.”

  He turned on the car stereo and sang one old love song after another to her.

  He turned on the car stereo and sang one old love song after another to her.

  Listening to him sing filled her with conflicting emotions. His deep, sexy voice left her longing to reach across to cup her hand between his legs. Another part of her felt as if he were promising to cherish her.

  Whenever traffic allowed, he glanced in her direction with a smile on his face.

  Fearing she’d lose her resolve to keep the evening strictly platonic, she leaned back in her seat and closed her eyes. Within seconds she realized having her eyes closed only contributed to the feeling of arousal she felt.

  He made no effort to engage her in conversation and she spent the rest of the drive struggling to control her conflicted feelings.

  He took her to an exclusive restaurant on the outskirts of Philadelphia. After they ordered, she sat staring at him in silence. He did have blu
e eyes. They were intense.

  “You’re staring,” he told her.

  She blinked. “I’m sorry. It’s just that I’m seeing you for the first time in decent light.”

  “And?”

  The expensive white jacket over a black shirt and pants he wore looked custom made. The contrasting colors looked great on him. “And…” She glanced at his wide shoulders before lifting her gaze to his face. He had dark brown hair and chiseled lips. His air of barely leashed power and self-confidence exhilarated her senses and heightened her desire.

  He was attractive without being particularly handsome. “And you’re male.” He arched a brow. “I’m not sure how to take that remark. Did you think I was female before?” Recalling the feel of his very male body pressed against hers as he whispered in her ear, she shook her head.

  “No. Of course not.”

  “Good. I’d hate to think I could pass for a woman.” He leaned forward, placing his hand over hers. “Tell me, sweet, do I pass muster?”

  Oh, hell to the yes. She shrugged. “I suppose you’ll do in a pinch.” He laughed and then abruptly sobered.

  She met his gaze. “Now you’re staring.”

  He shrugged. “Why would you expect any less? As you just pointed out, I’m male. And you are definitely female, very pretty, and totally voluptuous.”

  Her cheeks burned but she smiled. “Thank you. Jayvyn’s an unusual name. Does anyone other than Rayna call you Jay?”

  He grimaced. “Nearly everyone insists on calling me Jay.”

  “You don’t like it?”

  “My name is Jayvyn. Not Jay.”

  “But you look like a Jay.”

  He squeezed her hand. “You can call me anything you like, sweet.” Feeling a tingle shoot up her arm, she withdrew her hand from his. “Are you married?” He shook his head.

  “Have you ever been?”

  He hesitated before he finally nodded.

  “You’re divorced?”

  “No.” He looked away and released her hand.

  The muscles in his jaw looked clenched. “You’re a widower?”

  “Yes.”

  The word resonated with heartache and pain.

  She reached across the table to clutch his hand. “I’m so sorry, Jay.” She watched his big chest expand while he inhaled slowly before he brought his gaze back to hers. “I lost her a long time ago.”

  “But it still hurts?”

  He nodded. “Sometimes I think it will always hurt.”

  “What was her name?”

  “You probably couldn’t pronounce it. We called her Little Brown Reed.”

  “Why can I pronounce your name?”

  “Jayvyn isn’t my given name.”

  “What is your given name?”

  “Minninnewah. It’s Cheyenne. Roughly translated it means whirlwind.” Whirlwind? That pretty much described the effect he was having on her emotions. “Cheyenne? I thought you were Cherokee?”

  “Our father was raised by the Cheyenne and my name is Cheyenne but we were a matriarchal society who traced our clans through our mothers. Our mother was Cherokee so we are Cherokee.”

  “And your blue eyes?”

  He sighed. “The Cheyenne found our father when he was just a baby. They didn’t know who his parents were, but I think it’s safe to assume somewhere along the line, he had some Caucasian blood.”

  “Did he look it?”

  He shrugged. “He had these accursed blue eyes as well, but otherwise he looked like a Native American.”

  “Looked?”

  He nodded. “Both my parents are long dead.”

  Even though her parents now lived in Florida, Cayenne visited them twice a year and spoke to them on the phone several times a month. Her heart welled with sympathy. “Oh, Jay, I’m sorry.”

  “Thanks, sweet. I appreciate your kindness, but I’d rather not spend our time together discussing the past.”

  “What would you like to talk about?”

  “You.”

  “Dull subject, but okay. What do you want to know?”

  “Why you’re content to chase a man who doesn’t deserve you?”

  She lowered her lids. “I love him.”

  He lifted her hand to his mouth and nibbled at her fingers. “And does he love you?” Her cheeks burned. “You’ve been talking to Rayna?”

  “I didn’t need to talk to her. I saw how he behaved at the club with other women when he knew you were there.”

  She pulled her hand away from his. “We’re divorced. He can do whatever he likes.”

  “So can you.”

  “I’m aware of that.”

  “But?”

  She shrugged. “But there’s no one else I’m interested in dating.”

  “Isn’t there, sweet?”

  She moistened her lips before she met his gaze. “You’re flattering yourself.” He laughed. “Damn, I like you.”

  “Sounds like a personal problem to me.”

  His smile vanished and he reached across the table to recapture her hand. “Don’t waste either of our times trying to convince me you’re indifferent to me. We both know better.” She shook her head. “You know I want him back. That doesn’t leave any room for the way you’re behaving and talking.”

  “This is what it is, sweet.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning I always get the woman of my choice.”

  There was no point in pretending his words didn’t delight and flatter her. She moistened her lips. “What about your women? I have no desire to be just another of your conquests.” He lifted her fingers to his mouth. “I’m sure my matchmaking niece has already told you that I’m not married, engaged, or otherwise committed.” He smiled. “I’m yours to command, sweet.” She stared at him, her stomach twisting into knots. “Oh, Jay.”

  “Be careful how you handle me.”

  The idea of handling him excited her. To cover it, she shrugged. “Or?”

  “Or you might find it difficult to tell me no.”

  Assuming she wanted to tell him no. She experienced a thrill at the thought. “You’re supposed to be helping me win him back.”

  win him back.”

  “I’ll do that—when hell freezes the fuck over!”

  She compressed her lips. “If that’s how you feel, why are we here?” His easy smile returned. “You enchant me.”

  She stared at him. Whether she actually should, she believed him. The truthfulness of his assertion was visible in his eyes and clear in his voice. Or did she just want to believe he meant what he said?

  He nodded. “I’ve never had to lie to get what I want from a woman, sweet. I mean it. You totally enchant me—

  you have from the moment we met.”

  She swallowed slowly. Her heart raced. “I don’t know what to say,” she admitted.

  “Then just listen. I want to get to know you—in the biblical sense.” So he wanted the easy pussy he accused her of giving Michael. “That’s not going to happen!” She tugged at her hand until he released it.

  “I wouldn’t bet on that.”

  “And I wouldn’t bet on that caveman attitude getting you very far.” He laughed and then abruptly sat staring at her neck in silence.

  She placed a hand over her throat. “What?”

  He shook his head and extended his hand. “Let’s call a truce and dance.” Slow dancing with him was not a good idea but she placed her hand in his.

  He squeezed it gently before releasing it and rising. “Trust me, sweet. I won’t ever willingly hurt you.” Despite her misgivings about the advisability of dancing with him after his admission, his words resonated deep inside her. Tossing caution aside, she walked onto the dance floor with him. When he stopped, she went willingly into his arms.

  Although he held her close, he didn’t attempt to grind against her nor did he allow his hands to slide down her back to touch her ass.

  After several moments, her comfort level with him increased enough for her to slip her ar
ms inside his jacket.

  “Who were you with?” she asked him.

  “When?”

  She kept her cheek against his shoulder. “The night we met at the club.”

  “Rayna.”

  She looked up at him. “Rayna?”

  “Rayna.”

  “But you said…you implied—”

  “You said you weren’t alone and I said I wasn’t either. You decided I must be with someone in whom I had a romantic interest. The assumption was yours.”

  “You let me think you were with another woman!”

  “I let you? Okay. My bad.” He tightened his arm around her waist. “We don’t have enough time together to waste it arguing, sweet.”

  She nodded. He was right. Why argue when she could enjoy being in the circle of his arms? She pressed her cheek against his shoulder again. “Do you love her…them?”

  He brushed his lips against the top of her head. “Who?”

  “Your woman…women. Are you in love with any of them?”

  “No.”

  She lifted her head again to look up at him. “Why not? Because you still love your wife?”

  “I have and expect to always have the fondest memories of my Little Brown Reed. She was the only woman I’ve ever loved. I’ll never forget her and will always cherish her memory and the time we shared.”

  “But?”

  “But I’m no longer in love with her or anyone else.” He bent his head to brush his lips against her ear. “I’m yours for the taking, sweet.”

  She trembled and gripped the back of his shirt. “Don’t.”

  He nibbled her ear. “Don’t what?”

  “Don’t make me feel things for you I don’t want to feel.”

  “You can trust me,” he whispered but lifted his head.

  “You can trust me,” he whispered but lifted his head.

  “I think I do trust you, but I still want him back.”

  “You keep telling yourself that while I change your mind.”

  She sucked in a breath but made no effort to pull away from him.

  They finished the dance in silence.

  The next was fast and rhythmic. She was delighted to find he was a sexy, skillful dancer who seemed to enjoy dancing fast as much as he did dancing slowly.